Tuesday, August 31, 2004
My good buddy recommended that we go ride the ATV's around. "Alright," was my retort. And off we went. After a considerable time riding around, we met up at the top of a hill and he stated that there was a slope that he could not conquer... well, me, being me, I decided that it couldn't possibly be that bad, so I followed him to the alleged hill and began my ascent. Halfway to the top, I realized I was not in a low enough gear to continue. I do the only logical thing, and shift down. There-in lies my mistake. I shifted and was unable to gain an upward momentum again. Oh but the ATV was. It took off out from under me, like a skinny woman after sex. My buddy said all he saw was tires, then me standing there looking at the tires. All I saw was that big fucker comin down on top of me, so I moved, like a skinny woman after sex. It didn't help, that bitch still came down on top of me. Fukn hurt like hell too, I called in sick to work on Monday. I had Tuesday off anyway so I got to recoup a little. That and it was awesome havin 4 days off.... just wish I was feelin better cuz, DAMN!!
On other notes, I'm rampin up my picture takin finger for the wedding that I'm shooting on Saturday. I have 3 checklists of pictures that should be taken. I should be able to make this wedding look like a million bucks.
Wish me luck, for now I go to the dark side of the subway.
Lost Connections
Many times I find myself thinking about friends/relatives that I have lost or moved on from. It saddens me to think that someone could mean so little to me that I really don't even care. I don't. It seems that if they cared we would still be in touch, so that leads me to my point... Why the fk to I concern myself with stupid shit like this. It really makes no sense. Today I graduated my training program and am now "entry level" I'll tell you what tho, I have never been so grateful or excited to be entry level. Oh and the money. GD! It's gonna be awesome (provided, of course, that I keep my job). A person that I admire and love did not pass the 5 day exam. It pains me. Bad things should never happen to people you love. It's almost worse than if I would have lost my job. It bothers me about the same. I'm just upset that it happened.
MOVIN ON.... A couple that I'm friends with (and have been for YEARS) is moving into thier new house this week. I assisted in burying an underground fence for the dogs. You know the kind, they work by shocking the dogs when they get too close to the boundary wire, yeah. Not to be sadistic, but it was FKN herhairyass. They just seemed like they didn't want to learn, or were very slow in the process of learning... could not understand why they were getting shocked. What's worse is that when they would get shocked you could just see them jump back and hear em yelpin. They have a small dog that it just paralized when he got shocked, so she runs over to the fence and grabs the dog and procedes to walk PARALLEL to the fence. Dog's about to kill over and she's holdin him next to the fkn fence. I thought I was gonna die, it was so FKN funny!
Todays final thought and my new pickup line, "Ya want a Lil'JSM in ya?"
Lemon Fresh Scent
Drama, you're bustin my sack here, ya gotta knock that shit off! Fer FK sake! "But I can't help it...the fukr broke my heart" says Drama.
I ALMOST WENT MY FAT JAP ASS BACK TO JAIL!!! HOLY SHIT!!! Okay so I had until the first of this month to finish paying my court fines... ended up being like $72 something left to pay, my stupid ass remembers this shit just hours before I am scheduled to see my PO. I fkn panicked, called mommy, cuz that's what ya do, and begged and pleaded that she go down to the courthouse to pay the fines for me and bring me the receipt. She dun it, thank the lord, cuz my jap ass cannot be in jail for one more fkn second. THAT PLACE FREAKS ME OUT!! I have too many addictions to be in jail. PO says to me, "You realize that was a violation of your probation?" I play stupid thinking maybe he would let me off, and say, "No..." Fer fk sake right... I fkn know that it is, just scared shitless of jail. Then he goes, "It's okay cuz you got it paid, but watch yourself." HOLY SHIT. That was not good... BUT hopefully by this coming tuesday I will be able to drive my OWN jap ass around town and back and forth to work and such.
Drama and I was jus talkin bout some stairs and how I can't handle that cuz I one fat fkr, and that my fat cost me $4,000 and another $4,000 to divorce her. Then she turned into cancer and then a disease and then a malignant tumor. Even though I had it removed by my doctor/attorney (at much cost) It never seems to be all gone and keeps creepin back up. Sometimes the tumor calls me too. AND expects that I pay it money for our separation. Can I not just be RID OF THE WHALE-SIZED TUMOR?!?! I've decided to call my tumor "baby's-mama" Can I also just say that I hate cancerous tumors!
CONCERN!!! OMG!!
Two posts in one day… how do you rate? Check this out, I’m smoggin right? There is this car parked outside, keys left on the floor board, window down, smogs left on the seat. I do what every man in his mid teen would do, and I start playing with the mirrors. Left mirror all the way down and facing out, the right mirror, all the way down and to the right also. Car owner walks up and reaches into the car to grab his smogs. Lights one and keeps on walkin. OMG I damn near freaked. It was crazy! I thought he was getting in his car. FK! CLOSE! Yeah, it’s just a good thing he didn’t see me fkn with his car. He was an older man but built like a Mack Truck and coulda kicked my ASS!!
Glad he just kept walkin.
I requested Saturday the 4th off work cuz I will be photographing my sisters wedding. I am so scared that I am not gonna have any good pictures when I’m done and will have ruined her “perfect” day. It seriously FREAKS me out! I will admit that I have taken some really kick ass pictures, but they are rare. By rare, I mean that of the 30,000 pictures I have taken there are like maybe 50 really good ones. That is one in 600… Not good odds. I’m concerned.
To the Proverbial self, You Are An IDIOT!
K, so as it stands I have been DENIED the completion of my 10 day assessment. By a mere $10.66… my objective was $20,010.00 and I made $19,999.34. WTMF! I’ll tell you tho, I made Over my goal all 10 days except for 3 of which 2 I was sicker than hell and 1 day that I couldn’t even come to work. So I feel comfortable in my ability to sell and have confidence that I will pass my 5 day assessment. If I don’t, CP better be ready for me cuz that’s where I’ll be. I
In other news, a white man shot a cop yesterday in an attempted homicide. “I was pushing the gun away from my face when he shot off my third finger,” said the Officer. What shame has befallen the white race? Now not only do they have rednecks and hillbillies to worry about, they also have stupid crack addict fkrs shooting cops too. What will ever happen.
At the white house this morning the president announced that ketchup may no longer be sold in glass bottles, this answer to many prayers will be enforced immediately.
And now, I am sick of news. I learned today that I have the POWER! I can not only order everything that we offer (sept for bus stuff), I can also order, ship, and return modems as well. I have got authorization comin’ out my ass. Oh, feel the power! YEAH! I’ve also decided that “Yes” and “No” ARE perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question. I have been implementing this for several days now and it works. It’s simple and to the point. And we all know that I am one to get to the point.
My coach said to me that, “… no matter what it takes, get on and get off…” I like that way of looking at it… hehehehe it’s quick and to the point. I laughed so hard, snot came out my nose and I farted a little.
Next on the agenda, some fun! Click on this link and be prepared for a laugh. This goes out to all my friends. And to all those slower than
With all these girls????? WTF
Drama, you make me cry. I read ur blog today and just about did that. It was moving. The whole part about getting "busy" with the X-box.... I know JUST what you mean! LMFAO! Kidding aside, I was just about in tears tho. I wish the best for you too! You are awesome! Just a part of that I have to quote tho,
"Anyway....I worry about the General sometimes. With all these girls. He is an awesome guy and any girl would be lucky to have him. I just hope he gets a good girl. One that treats him like he should be treated! He deserves it. I just hope he can find someone to make him happy. :) Love ya General!!"
I like to think this is true, sometimes I wonder if the aforementioned girl exists. hmmm. Just me thinkin out loud. That song, Diggin up bones.... yupper, that's what I end up doin most days. Re-hashin' old shit that shoulda fukd off a long, long time ago, in a land far, far away. Come on women "Satisfying your hunger has never been this easy!" I read a quote that I loved and copied it, "In the face of uncertainty, there is nothing wrong with hope." I hope I still have a job after next week. I hope I can find love again.
While I'm bloggin, almost forgot something. I was bitchn one day and a family friend told me to make a list of things that I am grateful for, WTF, I thought. Can't hurt, might as well anyway, haven't done that before.... so here I go.
1. My Children (J, E, and S) The apples of your daddy's eye.
2. My Family, Without them, I'd be homeless or WORSE... computerless.
3. My Friends, (In no particular order)
LJ without you I'd miss my weekly bean abuse sessions,
MK don't know what i'd ever do without Super Duper Muscle Boy to help when I need,
JK what else do you do but love this one... no need to mention our affair
NC GDWHOMAN! Drama can be good in small doses,
TH Keep a Jap sane, slow down on the hottness tho K hon,
NH Many thanks for my USOC alone,
TM My Tittie hugs are priceless!
NW Who is single handidly responsible for rounding up the entire state for a BBQ, and thank the lord for that!
SW n FAM I don't even wanna think of where I would be without the aiding and abedding of this wonderful fam! love you all
And yes I forgot some, and for those I appologize.
4. My Health, as poor as it is some days. In general, I'm thankful for what I have.
5. My New Career, Nothin like gettin paid $$$ and lots of it! :)
6. My Computer.... yup, you all knew that was comin... I named her LJSM Jr.
7. I can't think of any thing else to put in just yet... I just keep comin up with more stuff to bitch about, so I think I'll quit fer now.
My list is small but very inclusive. For all the love that is in me, I sure can dig up alot of pissed off.
L-8-R
HOLY SHIT
I spent freakin fer-days trying to get my blog back online.... it was down for seriously EVER! OMG... to all that view it... welcome back!
BTW along with my blog being viewable at http://www.liljsm.com you can also email me at LilJSM@LilJSM.com hehehehe!! I LOVE IT!
I found a quote that matches me so close, it scares me.
"I go out of my way to avoid treating women like objects, then I find myself treating objects like women"
Allen Wells - Premium Blend
NEW LOCATION!
Blog for General Yoshi Tao now located at the following url
http://www.LilJSM.com
:) YEAH!
Bring It On!
As I told my good friend yesterday, “I’m goin gay!” I can’t fkn handle the drama of woman any more. I’ve fkn had it up to my nose and CANNOT deal with it anymore. Then she said she was gonna throw a party for me coming out of the closet… Whoa! Hold that shit right there, comin out of the closet? I don’t fkn hardly think so! EW! OMG! So my other mind changed my plans yet again. I’m not goin gay, that sucks… and I prefer not to suck, licking and eating I’m certainly okay with, sucking… I don’t fkn think so. I am just gonna give it a break again… and see what happens. Someone once said, “Frustrations start to build up.” Uh yeah, I think so. It seems to never fkn end. The whale called me and just told me that the daycare is increasing their rates… it will now be $840 per month. . . . . . . . . . . . Uh, WTMF?!?!?! Who can fkn afford this shit! I thought that $500 per month was horrible. Now? OMFG! Hey, let me lube myself with hundred dollar bills while you rape me PLEASE! I get paid on Friday and out of my $1,200 check, my take home is about $530. LESS THAN HALF!!! Bring on the ass-pounding rape! FK! I have sworn off any more kids. I have sworn off women (for a while anyway). I can’t drive, I can’t breathe, I can’t FKN CAN’T! OMG! Strike me with lightening now… does it get any better? I’m sure it gets fkn worse! Pretty soon, I get a promotion to WHORE. Bring on the baseball bats and black men! Out!
ABC's as Described by Yoshi
A man who’s lost, without a vision
A man who seems to have no soul
A man who’s life is indecision
A man who seemingly holds his own
By way of greed this hatred found
By way of fear he’s all alone
By way of love he can’t abound
By way of distrust he holds his own
Can my life be any more complicated
Can my life be any more wrong
Can my life be any more hated
Can my life support my own
Does anyone really even know
Does anyone see what’s shown
Does anyone live to grow
Does anyone hold their own
Everyone can see what’s happening
Everyone knows they’re grown
Everyone has lost what’s dying
Everyone loses their own
Forget that you try to learn
Forget that you think you know
Forget that you try and burn
Forget that you hold your own
Give up on life, it’s what I feel
Give up on love, it only roams
Give up on feeling that you’re surreal
Give up on holding your own
Hold on to hate, you’ve come to know
Hold on to love, or let it go
Hold on to trust, and let it grow
Hold on to you, holding your own
Inside of me, there is adoration
Inside of me, much pain is sewn
Inside of me, no admiration
Inside of me, I’m holding my own
Just because it looks so hard
Just because I seem so grown
Just because you seem on guard
Just because you hold your own
Knock and enter please
Knock and find me alone
Knock and leave with ease
Knock, I’m holding my own
Leave me be that’s how I wish it
Leave me be in comfort all alone
Leave me be I will find it
Leave me be to hold my own
Many times I wish to feel the love
Many times I find I hate it
Many times I want to rise above
Many times I even crave it
A man who seems to have no soul
A man who’s life is indecision
A man who seemingly holds his own
By way of greed this hatred found
By way of fear he’s all alone
By way of love he can’t abound
By way of distrust he holds his own
Can my life be any more complicated
Can my life be any more wrong
Can my life be any more hated
Can my life support my own
Does anyone really even know
Does anyone see what’s shown
Does anyone live to grow
Does anyone hold their own
Everyone can see what’s happening
Everyone knows they’re grown
Everyone has lost what’s dying
Everyone loses their own
Forget that you try to learn
Forget that you think you know
Forget that you try and burn
Forget that you hold your own
Give up on life, it’s what I feel
Give up on love, it only roams
Give up on feeling that you’re surreal
Give up on holding your own
Hold on to hate, you’ve come to know
Hold on to love, or let it go
Hold on to trust, and let it grow
Hold on to you, holding your own
Inside of me, there is adoration
Inside of me, much pain is sewn
Inside of me, no admiration
Inside of me, I’m holding my own
Just because it looks so hard
Just because I seem so grown
Just because you seem on guard
Just because you hold your own
Knock and enter please
Knock and find me alone
Knock and leave with ease
Knock, I’m holding my own
Leave me be that’s how I wish it
Leave me be in comfort all alone
Leave me be I will find it
Leave me be to hold my own
Many times I wish to feel the love
Many times I find I hate it
Many times I want to rise above
Many times I even crave it
Maybe I'll finish this one day... for now I'm old and tired and could give a fuck.
