Can the past haunt you... if you don't remember it?

They say memories are what make us who we are. They shape how we view the world and how we respond to situations. They are a reminder of the mistakes we've made and the trials we've survived. But what if those memories no longer existed? What if you didn't know why you should avoid hot stoves or couldn't remember your first kiss?

When I was younger, I attended Minico High School. I always thought, "I'll remember this forever!" It was my first high school, the coolest thing in my life to that point and where I met my first girl friend. Although it was some of the best highlights of my adolescent life, I don't remember anything. I was just trying to think back and all I can recall is her beautiful face, smile, the way she kissed me, how warm her hands always were, the way she made me beam every time she walked into the room. But I don't remember what we used to do, where we used to hang out, who we used to hang out with, or even what the weather was like... nothing. I don't remember the school, the classes I took, the other friends I had, the bedroom I slept in at the time... nothing. It's just a fuzzy black cloud where memories once stood. It almost brings me to tears because I want so badly to remember... How can I not remember my first high school? Just a few good memories. I'd settle for one. I don't remember. I just don't remember.

Rearing?

Every few days she turns to me and says, "don't yell at him" while I'm in the middle of NOT yelling at him. Then one day, I yelled and I made a point to say that I was yelling, just to clear the air. And she still thinks I'm yelling when I'm not. I'm not deaf, I hear things, and when she's yelling at him (and to clarify this, I mean, screaming at the top of her lungs) it's really hard to avoid hearing it. Every evening from about 6 until he goes to bed at 8:30, all I hear is them arguing and her screaming. That boy ever yells at me and you can bet your ass that I'm gonna slap his face or spank him. Which probably explains why he doesn't yell at me... that and the fact that when I tell him to do something that he doesn't do, there are consequences... The only 'consequence' from her is that she gets red in the face from the screaming. oh no, that's scary. (Fuuu, NOT!) And now because she's 'had enough' she wants ME to fucking read a parenting book. Is she fucking serious? When she's not here, he acts just fine: Gets his homework done, chores finished in a timely fashion, room picked up, minimal fighting with his sister, and listens when I tell him something. Why? Because he knows that I will put a boot in his ass if he doesn't. There is a reason that he does what he's told when she is gone. He knows that I won't take his backtalk or dinkin' off. So I ask the obvious question... Who should be reading this parenting book? Yeah, me... right. NO. I'm not the one with boundary issues, I'm not the one who lets a ten year old walk all over me, I'm not the one allowing him to talk to me like that, I'm not the one ignoring any disciplinary action because it might hurt. Keeping a child in line can sometimes hurt. I'm not saying that there is ever a reason to bruise a child. Obviously I'm talking about a firm spanking or slapping his mouth when he talks back, but I guess that's too much to ask.
So no, I'm not wasting what little spare time I have by reading a book that claims to teach me how to be an effective parent.
Oh, and one more thing... I'm not a fan of medicating children. I think most issues can be dealt with by being a parent. I do agree that there are times when medication can be used as an aid, but when you make your child take it because you can't deal with them, there is a fucking problem. The problem is YOU, ya FUCK. Not the child. Quit medicating your children because you're a bad parent. Start spanking the little one when he needs it! Get him in line and the medication will be completely unnecessary.
And another thing, while I'm on a roll here, don't fucking complain to me about 'I'm tired' or 'I just don't have the energy'. Why don't you quit putting so much fucking food in your damn face and get off the fucking couch and lose a hundred pounds? It's called jogging! People have been doing it for centuries, and it's a great way to lose weight! Try it the fuck out! Trust me, you'll have more energy than you know what to do with! This self-loathing bullshit needs to stop. Maybe, JUST MAYBE, taking care of yourself first would be a good fucking place to start, eh? How can you be an effective parent when you aren't even an effective human! If you just yell at your children from the couch, how the fuck can you honestly expect good results? Get the fuck off the couch and get involved!! Quit complaining until you've actually done something about it. I, for one, am tired of picking up your damn slack. I'm out.

Thank God?

What if you woke up today with only the things you thanked God for last night? What would you have? Would you have the things that are most important to you? I know I don’t always sound appreciative of the things I have, the family that supports me, or the time I’ve been given on this earth, but mark my words, I am very grateful. It’s a rare day when you really take inventory of all the blessings in your life. As I sit in front of my ‘command center’ staring at my 40 inch computer monitor (coupled with a 19”, 21”, 24” and a 15” Macbook pro) I take a big breath and feel grateful for all that I’ve been given. The flat screen is my Sheppard, I shall not want. For it is thy beautiful 1080p HD that bestows my next want upon me.
And while I’m at it, thank you for children who behave (most of the time), a wife who loves me and tries not to ride her menstrual cycle more than absolutely necessary, a dog that obeys, computers that work and do it before I crush them with a mallet, Mountain Dew that so tastefully bestows it’s deliciousness upon my eager soul, and also for the mind, body and soul to enjoy every little second I have with each of these. May your life be as blessed as mine. God speed and good night.