Where are we now?

I know where you are coming from. And I am scared too. I have trusted myself my entire life. Trusted that I would make the right choice, decision or action. Unfortunately, sometimes I have led myself astray. Right now, it's harder for me to stay and deal with our problems than it would be to leave and just call it quits. Running away would be so much easier. It always has been. I am forcing myself to face the hardships and deal with the unpleasantries because I love you, unlike any love I've ever felt. I'm begging for your help. I feel like all you want to do is talk about what we've already gone over. I don't want to repeat what we've said, I want new stuff that we haven't said. I want to discover new options that we haven't thought of yet. I can't continue to go over the same things. It becomes more irritating than the problem itself.
It seems the harder I try to work on our relationship the easier it would be to just give up. I am giving everthing I can to us. I am trying so hard and it pains me to think that you wouldn't see that. I want to forget the troubles and go back to the way it was a year ago, when I felt like you were on my side. Me and you against the world, together we could do anything.