Have you ever noticed that you are completely relaxed only a couple times in a day. Sometimes not even that much. But I just noticed that one of those times for me is when I pee. It's the strangest thing. Usually nothing on my mind, complete relaxation. It's kinda kewl, I wish I could pee 100 times a day if it would be that same feeling. LOL. I crave relaxation. I think that is the bulk of why I have done so much research into techniques and such. I wish I could find the perfect relaxation technique. That would be freakin kewl. But till then, I guess I'll just have to deal with what I know so far.
I have found another means of relaxation, we'll call it relax-o-tron. This technique for relaxation can be exhausting but mostly it's very effective. I seem to be more at ease with everything. I used to think that things will just work out, either by themselves or with some intervention. That theory changed about a year ago, and is just now, slowly returning. Life seems to be much easier. Problems are solved with less complication and more resolve. I seem to have a spice for life that I have been trying to get for what seems like EVER! I love going home after work, I love being around and even tho this really cuts into my sitting around time, I am more content than I have ever been. Love is a powerful thing. I don't believe that it could physically move a mountain, but it does so much for people.
As most of you know I have become a disestablishmentarian in the last 9 or so years. It is good for my heart to know that she is also, at least regarding the reverse-psychosis that plagues this town. It is so nice to feel like you want to becoem a better person rather than feeling like you HAVE to. Have to's can kiss my ass!
Work is becoming easier to endure. She makes it more pleasant. A beam of light to a dungeon with plastic head-phone-shaped shackles and an invisible forcefield that contains all beings to the vacinity. My light house on a dark stormy sea. Show me the way, and allow me to walk it on my own terms. That is all I ask.
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