Happy Jappy! DUDE, WHAT?

Watching the city from high, it is nearly sunset and the city is buzy. I can see people too caught up in their lives to know that someone was watching them. I felt like a stalker of sorts. There is a calming peace that can be found when you put everything out of your mind and listen to the crickets and birds sing their solomn lullaby. A calm that only nature can provide. I must have sat in that same spot for an hour. I watched as the sun faded behind the mountains and the city began to come alive. It was as if I was watching a bat sleep, as soon as the sun faded it came to life. Lights came on one by one then more and at some point it was as if the sun had come back up over the city. It was bright again and buzier than it seemed before. I watched planes land and planes take off. I watched people come and go. I heard a single cricket and watched it as it lulled itself into bliss. I love nature for the peace that can be found within. Total time on hill, 2 hours. I think that was the single longest and shortest time in my entire life. So many things go thru my head in a normal two hour time slot and this seemed to be so many more and yet it was so many less. I guess it was just different maybe not less or more. I wish that I could capture some of the thoughts and bottle them for later recovery. Problem is, I can't really remember most of what went thru my head, and to take a pad just ruins the experience.
I could probably count, on one hand, the number of words that have come out of my mouth since I left the hill. Quiet contemplation. It is peaceful bliss. My ass still hurts from the damn rock I was sitting on and it's been almost an hour since then.
One thought I do remember was that statistically, so many things happened in the two hours that I was up there. X number of people got in a car crash, Y number of people choked on their seatbelt when it happened. Quite amazing to think of all the things that happen, even if you do nothing. The world continues. People will go about the humdrum of daily life, sometimes clueless to the world around them. I get caught up in that sometimes. I have stated many times that I get stuck on the monotony of life but if you really look around life is full of change, things change. Everyday something is different. If you focus on the differences that take place around you everyday how would it be possible to fall into the rut of monotony? I could probably answer that question, but I'll leave well enough alone, and let you contemplate that for a while.
Something about the damn crickets tho.... I cannot seem to get the sound out of my head. It was so melodious and freeing, then when the birds joined, the harmony was incredible. I want that on cd, digitized forever and always. Ready on demand for my listening pleasure. BTW, I do NOT have control issues.
The move to Boise seems to be coming along as best as can be planned. I want this to go as smoothly as possible (duh!), but how? That is the question. I am anxious to start a new job in a city that I love, with the only woman in the world fit to share it with me. Even as she sits behind me, clueless as to what I'm typing, she will know soon enough that I will always love her. How can you tell someone that you want to grow old with her, without sounding like a complete jap, er uh, sap, I mean? I want her to know that I have never, ever had a stirring in my heart like I do now. Seconds tick by, turning into minutes that turn into months and it seems that we have been together forever and yet it seems that only days have crept by. I have heard before that love is timeless and now I agree. When your in love seconds can seem like days and years can seem like an instant. How can I make her understand that this instant and every instant after this, I want her to be mine. I want to share my life with her. How can I let her know that she is irreplacable. At this beginning of our lives together, I feel that things are delicate. Considering the span that I know our relationship will last, the last two months seem so insignificant and yet it is the most important part because it is the foundation of our mutual binding. I firmly believe that the foundation of a relationship is certainly the most important, and I also feel that we have an awesome start to that.
We have driven alot lately and even in the monotony of the road, I glance in her direction and see her sleeping peacefully and cannot help the smile that comes to my face. Sometimes I just stare at her until she looks back at me, just to see the way her lights up when she sees me staring at her. Staring is rude, I know, but I can't help it.
Today's final thought... My life began when my oldest child was born and has ramped to unbelievable heights with the introduction of my love. I can't wait to see where we will go from here. If the excitement doesn't kill me, I may just live to be a happy old jap.