I just recently discovered something very interesting about myself. I am unsure if this discovery is new or I just forgot about it a long, long time ago. Here goes. My entire attitude in life and about life revolves around my feelings for others and the mutual return of said feelings. I validate my life by the people that I know and the people that like me.
I am not crooked, nor am I stalwart. I am somewhere in between, I feel a need to be more valorous in my daily doings, and yet I fight with myself to pay an attorney that is crooked. Even though, according to the law he dutifully earned the money he is owed. I feel betrayed by trusting him. He was my divorce attorney and as such, I expected certain actions and behaviors from him (I think I may have been a little mislead, as I was told, "He is the best there is.") There is a certain lack of personal satisfaction that comes from feeling the need to short him on the bill. Although I do NOT feel that he earned what he charged, especially considering that he did not help me the way that he was suppose to. Isn't it up to your lawyer to tell you things about a contract that you may not know? Isn't it up the him also to make clear any and ALL stipulations in said contract... before signing? He didn't. Needless to say, I almost signed something that wasn't even close to what I wanted, and would have, in the end, ruined me. For this I feel like a crooked person. Even through the life I lead, I cannot justify paying him. This is my concern.
Back to my personal validation, I feel that people like me because I am "me". I am a fun person to be around, yet seem to be having more and more "bad days" since the aforementioned divorce proceedings began. Something about divorce that turns people, once loving and kind to distant, strange people that most have no desire to be around. For those of you that stuck with me and are sticking with me, it means more to me than anything. Words will never even begin to describe my gratitude. I owe it solely to these people who help me out, my new clutch on life. I am beginning (yesterday in fact) to understand what it is that people see in me and will devote my life to improving those things. I will focus on the best vitamin for making friends - - - B1.
My Affirmation
Be the best friend that I can be!
Be supportive of those in need!
Help where help is needed!
With my new clutch on life I will be a better person!
I am not crooked, nor am I stalwart. I am somewhere in between, I feel a need to be more valorous in my daily doings, and yet I fight with myself to pay an attorney that is crooked. Even though, according to the law he dutifully earned the money he is owed. I feel betrayed by trusting him. He was my divorce attorney and as such, I expected certain actions and behaviors from him (I think I may have been a little mislead, as I was told, "He is the best there is.") There is a certain lack of personal satisfaction that comes from feeling the need to short him on the bill. Although I do NOT feel that he earned what he charged, especially considering that he did not help me the way that he was suppose to. Isn't it up to your lawyer to tell you things about a contract that you may not know? Isn't it up the him also to make clear any and ALL stipulations in said contract... before signing? He didn't. Needless to say, I almost signed something that wasn't even close to what I wanted, and would have, in the end, ruined me. For this I feel like a crooked person. Even through the life I lead, I cannot justify paying him. This is my concern.
Back to my personal validation, I feel that people like me because I am "me". I am a fun person to be around, yet seem to be having more and more "bad days" since the aforementioned divorce proceedings began. Something about divorce that turns people, once loving and kind to distant, strange people that most have no desire to be around. For those of you that stuck with me and are sticking with me, it means more to me than anything. Words will never even begin to describe my gratitude. I owe it solely to these people who help me out, my new clutch on life. I am beginning (yesterday in fact) to understand what it is that people see in me and will devote my life to improving those things. I will focus on the best vitamin for making friends - - - B1.
My Affirmation
Be the best friend that I can be!
Be supportive of those in need!
Help where help is needed!
With my new clutch on life I will be a better person!
No comments:
Post a Comment