My horoscope for today said this:
"Thinking about far-off places and distant friends? Well, why just think about them? Whether you play host or decide to go for a visit, it's time to close the distance between you and where you want to be."
Totally, could not be more true, I am yearning for a far-off place because of a distant friend. I don't want to just think about her anymore. Playing host is something I am not very good at, but for her, I would go to the end of the earth (which apparently is in Canada). Can it really be time to close the distance?
I often fight with myself about finding the right one. If in fact it is possible, is it plausible? What are the statistics? Anyone know? I have yet to hear of any. I was told once that people believe something because of two reasons; they fear it to be true, or they want it to be true. I want to believe in the perfect partner for everyone, but then my analytical bug kicks in with a rebuttal. Even as much as I try to push it away and make it shut up, it's there and always will be.
I have to wonder if there are too many different type of people in this world to have a chance at meeting that perfect someone. I have thought before that I had found the 'one.' Turns out she is a raging slut. I just can't deal with that. I will forgive almost anything but being a slut. I didn't push that 'relationship' any farther once I found that out. I have never been one to push a relationship faster or farther than it is going naturally. My ex-wife for instance.... We were friends for several years, dated for a year, lived with each other for almost a year, and then got married. I am just the type that like things to progress nice and slow, for emotional security, I guess. I really have to wonder tho, if I like things to progress slowly because I am worried about something else. Maybe I do it because I'm concerned that moving too fast will always end in tragedy. I have seen enough examples of that to take heed to the warning. I may be dumb, but I am not stupid.
With that, I have one more confession to make and that is as follows: I do not know what love is. I believe that it is one of those feelings you must have before you can understand it completely. I read a poem once that stuck with me and it goes something like this...
"Thinking about far-off places and distant friends? Well, why just think about them? Whether you play host or decide to go for a visit, it's time to close the distance between you and where you want to be."
Totally, could not be more true, I am yearning for a far-off place because of a distant friend. I don't want to just think about her anymore. Playing host is something I am not very good at, but for her, I would go to the end of the earth (which apparently is in Canada). Can it really be time to close the distance?
I often fight with myself about finding the right one. If in fact it is possible, is it plausible? What are the statistics? Anyone know? I have yet to hear of any. I was told once that people believe something because of two reasons; they fear it to be true, or they want it to be true. I want to believe in the perfect partner for everyone, but then my analytical bug kicks in with a rebuttal. Even as much as I try to push it away and make it shut up, it's there and always will be.
I have to wonder if there are too many different type of people in this world to have a chance at meeting that perfect someone. I have thought before that I had found the 'one.' Turns out she is a raging slut. I just can't deal with that. I will forgive almost anything but being a slut. I didn't push that 'relationship' any farther once I found that out. I have never been one to push a relationship faster or farther than it is going naturally. My ex-wife for instance.... We were friends for several years, dated for a year, lived with each other for almost a year, and then got married. I am just the type that like things to progress nice and slow, for emotional security, I guess. I really have to wonder tho, if I like things to progress slowly because I am worried about something else. Maybe I do it because I'm concerned that moving too fast will always end in tragedy. I have seen enough examples of that to take heed to the warning. I may be dumb, but I am not stupid.
With that, I have one more confession to make and that is as follows: I do not know what love is. I believe that it is one of those feelings you must have before you can understand it completely. I read a poem once that stuck with me and it goes something like this...
Love is a feeling you feel, when you feel you are feeling a feeling that you've never felt before.
If that's the case, I think I am doomed to spend an eternity searching for love. I pray that in the end, love finds me.
In case love reads this, I live in I D A H O ! !
No comments:
Post a Comment